How much should one care

Looks like I talk a lot more in my first language.

I have been told by the boyfriend that I talk too much. We both have Vietnamese as our first language and use it to converse with each other.

When the words come easy to you and the person you are speaking with feels close to you, you tend to talk a lot about everything, because you feel safe and know that the person will understand at least literally, what you want to say, even if it is just your honest opinion about someone else that you would never say in public.

Apparently not in the boyfriend's case. Anything that is not my business, I should not care. I made a mistake yesterday commenting on his old teammates. In my defense, I did not badmouth them. I gave an honest and objective opinion, and if the teammates asked me directly, I would deliver the same. He said and I quote, "you should care less about people's business." Which is fine, I get it, and I agree. Then I came to an epiphany.

I talk way less in English.

Granted, when you have to speak in a language that is not your most fluent, you tend to speak less. Your brain sticks to the most convenient way and when it has to follow the less travelled road, it becomes lazy. Such a thing might not apply fully in my case.

A close friend of mine is a foreigner; we converse in English. Our conversations are almost never boring or reflect any of us in a negative way. We do less mundane talking, or should I say chirping, and focus more on English/French puns and psychological questions.

This is something I deeply enjoy yet cannot do with the boyfriend at the moment. I hope we can, one day. Meanwhile, perhaps I should not speak out of what people think is my turn.

Although if he actually pays attention to how I act in the office, he will realize how little I care.

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